whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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