He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
