Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Come see our sink grown plant.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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