no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a dick in a sweater?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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