one two three fourrrrnication!
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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