Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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