I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
