thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
i out mim tonsoeep
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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