It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
