He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
