haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize