if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
