The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
