She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
