How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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