It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
