so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize