I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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