my phone needs a breathalizer
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize