Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
