You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
