..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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