are you still at the devil's house?
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
