Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
