Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
