i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
