so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
