At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
