if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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