i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
