i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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