maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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