I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
literally had 100 drinks last night.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize