i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
