There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Who died my cat blue again?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
