Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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