oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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