I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
