**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Ambien. No doubt about it.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
