I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
