I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
