I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize