STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
