White coat. Heels.
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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