nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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