its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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