Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Randomize
