U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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