I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
