Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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