She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Randomize
