8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Blood and glitter go together right?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
